Learn To Say No And How To
Reduce Anxiety Without Feeling Guilty!
Learn To Say No! Massage Therapists learn how to avoid stress and ...
... incorporate relaxation techniques for stress
into your self care program.
Listed below are a couple quick tips for fellow massage therapists that answers these two very important questions...
How to Reduce Anxiety?
How to Avoid Stress?
"Learn To Say No! ... How And When?"
One of the ways that many of us get ourselves into trouble is that we commit to too many things; we fail to say no.
We say, "Sure, I'll do it," or "No problem, I'll take care of it," when deep down, we know we don't really want to, or that we already have too much on our plates.
The problem with always saying yes is two-fold.
First, the end result is almost always feeling overwhelmed, stressed and tired. There is simply a point when enough is enough, a point of diminishing return when our attitude, spirit, even our productivity begins to suffer.
Our work suffers, as does our personal and family life. By saying yes too often, we begin to feel victimized and resentful that we have so much to do. Because we tend to feel guilty when we say no, it's often difficult to see that we were the ones who got ourselves into this mess by failing to say no more often.
The second major problem with failing to say no when it's appropriate to do so is that you end up with a slightly disingenuous attitude. In other words, you are doing things you really don't want to be doing or shouldn't be doing - but you are acting, on the surface, as if everything is just fine.
For example, you'll agree to perform a task or switch shifts with a coworker by saying, "Oh, it's all right," when what you really need is a day off to yourself. Then because you don't get your much-needed rest, you feel victimized by your overwhelming schedule or angry that so many people ask favors of you! Again, you played a key role in the creation of your own stress, but you believe the stress is caused by outside forces, or that it's inevitable.
Here is how to reduce anxiety and how to avoid stress...
Saying no without guilt is not selfish - it's a protective necessity. If someone said to you, "Can I have the air you breathe?" you'd probably question their sanity. You certainly wouldn't feel guilty saying no.
Yet if someone says, "Can I ask you to do something for me that will push you over the edge and make you feel stressed out and resentful?", there are many times that you'll agree either out of habit, obligation, or simply guilt. Sure, the person probably didn't phrase the request like that, but in reality, that's what is being asked of you.
Obviously there are many times that we can't say no, and many other times when it's in our best interest to say yes or that we simply want to say yes. Terrific! The trick is to use our wisdom, instead of old knee-jerk reactions, to decide when to say yes and when to say no.
Becomming more aware in our daily life, noticing our old knee-jerk reactions, is the trick to how to avoid stress and how to reduce anxiety. The question then arises, is this awareness training incorporated into your self care program?
The key to a successful self care program is to be reflective and to ask yourself, "All things considered - e.g., the feelings and needs of the person making the request, the need to say yes, and most importantly my own sanity, is it in my best interest to say yes, or is it okay to refuse"?
I think you'll discover that, put in this perspective, there are probably many instances when it's perfectly fine to learn to say no. Thus, you answer for yourself the questions of, "How to reduce anxiety and how to avoid stress?" Learn to say no! It's Ok! :-)
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